Free Love

Saw a van creepier than SBF's today. It offers free love instead of free candy.

bloody finger

This is CWV related because my SBF took one day off from hands-on van work after he sliced his fingernail in half on the diagonal. (And part of the finger.) He was building a bicycle and got his finger a little too close to the rotor. (In case you didn't know, a rotor is another name for the brake disc. I didn't know what it meant, but I acted like I did when he told me. I mean, I had an idea, but I still looked it up to be sure. It is sharp. Sharp enough to slice your finger if you're not careful!) Anyhow, I don't know if he's impervious to pain or if it was shock but he didn't even flinch when I poured 70% isopropyl alcohol on it and then hydrogen peroxide. (We used all the good germ killers.) 

He did go home and order some insulation for the CWV ceiling online. I knew he couldn't completely stay away ...

The sliced nail.

Another angle.

A rotor, in case you need a visual.

Finally! The floor is gone!

All the seats in the CWV were attached to these brackets that were bolted down with these huge bolts. They didn't have the tool size we needed to remove them at the Home Depot so SBF ordered one from the Internet. Unfortunately, that one was too big. Grrrrr. However, that man is super handy and made do with another tool.

The brackets were like this ...

And this ...

The tool we needed was one just a little bit smaller than THIS one.

All the bolts and brackets pulled!!

The moment we've been waiting for. (Well, one of the moments.)

It wasn't as bad we expected. Lots of dirt, some pens, an old SweetTarts packet, but otherwise pretty good.

 The emptier it gets, the more exciting it is!!

Oh! And some random plants were growing under there. Apparently moisture can be a big problemo with these vans, so if this is all the plant life she grew (no molds!) then we're doing pretty good. We haven't pulled the carpet from under the front seats year, but that's happening soon.

The next steps are more cleaning, some sanding, and addressing the rusty spots.

bringing the roof down

When we got her, CWV had this fluffy, fabric roof. It was torn in some spots and the foam was coming out around the edges. I also think it had some vital things embedded, like A/C vents and maybe a light or two?

It actually looks kind of amazing without the roof. (I'm sure there's a plan in place for the vital things that go up there.) In this picture you can also see that the grey panelling has been pulled out and all the seatbelts unbolted and taken down. (I helped a little bit with those. Then I had to go home and make pizza dough. Priorities.)

On a side note ...

I wanted to tell you about the "dealership" where we bought the CWV because it's kind of cool. We don't know all of her history, but we do know she spent some time in San Antonio and "was owned and maintained by the government," according to the Craigslist ad. The kid working at the dealership in Cedar Park said he bought her in an auction.

The dealership building is teeny tiny, about the size of my two car garage. Maybe a little smaller. It's like a large shed. A large shed with a sign in the bathroom declaring it a "Man's Place. Leave the Seat Up." (Which, on a second side note, is something we've discussed a few times lately.)

Anyhow, it was a tight space and I had a bunch of questions for the kid while he was trying to get our paperwork together. Yes, it's a family business. A year ago they sold it to a friend who claims to have since made one MILLION dollars off it from charging people $35 a week to park in the lot and advertise their cars. Dang! They also rent back space to sell their own vehicles, a fleet of large passenger vans and busses.

As we were wrapping things up, the kid's dad stopped by with two younger brothers in tow to help clean out a newly acquired blue van. The dad told me they got into this business when they started buying large vehicles to haul all of their FIFTEEN (15!!!) children around in. Same mom. Same dad. ONE of them is adopted. Don't worry, they know which one.

And in case you were wondering, they were ALL homeschooled. "It keeps them pure." And they are all very polite and disciplined. Alls you have to do is take a heavy hand to their backsides for the first 5 years. They learn pretty quick and voila! Great kids! Personally, I couldn't parent that way, but I could see how homeschooling 15 kids could make that necessary. I only met three of the family's kids that night, and they were all super polite and the one who seemed to be running the show really had his act together.

Of course I had about 50 more questions, but our paper CWV plate was printed and laminated in  a hurry, and before we knew it we were out the door ... so I guess that's all we get to know until the next large van purchase ...

The benches

The benches are what my SBF was most excited to GET RID OF. And I must say, removing them created a lot of space and really made it so you can see all the POTENTIAL. Like how a big ol' mattress would fit. And where the fridge will go. The important things.

When my big kid drove the CWV she said she felt like she was driving a bus. Y'all that's because it really does look bus-ish. The CWV with all her benches in place:

The CWV with all her benches GONE!

Sister van getting loaded with benches ... For some reason someone already took all of her old ones.

Sister Van is crammed full with benches now! If you're looking for rows of benches for really short people, THIS IS THE PLACE.

Captain Chairs

If I'm to stay with the theme, then this should be titled "musical captain chairs." This was one of the first things to change after the initial trip to the salvage yard. SBF took Sister Van's captain chairs and put them in the from in place of CWV's captain chairs. Apparently Sister Van's are more comfortable and they have armrests. They are also covered in fabric and need a good bath. CWV's chairs are covered in vinyl and look a little worn, but otherwise they are mostly the same. CWV's chairs will be bolted into the back for Thing 1 and Thing 2 to ride in comfort and safety, replacing the need for any and all rows of benches.

CWV's captain chairs.

A captain chair taken from Sister Van and bolted into CWV. I'll get better pictures of these, but you get the idea. We now have 4 captain chairs and we are very happy about that!

musical cup holders

Did you know you can just pull out the entire cup holder section of your vehicle? I did not. Not that I ever attempted such a thing. But it's perfectly doable if you have a handy, strong guy with tattoos nearby. SBF just yanked it out and then yanked out Sister Van's. We did side by side comparisons  and the conclusion was that both kind of suck, as far as cupholders go, but Sister Van's was a little bit better. Both are a sticky gross mess and I'll have to post pictures of the new cupholder in place when we get it all washed up.

CWV's guts behind the cupholder.

CWV's cupholder unit, complete with ashtray and Hall's cough drop.

Sister Van's cupholder unit. It almost holds SBF's big ol' coffee cup. But not really. Conclusion: He's gonna have to start drinking less coffee.

musical bumpers

One of the nicest things we took from The Sister Van was her bumper. Apparently it is pretty simple to take off bumpers. You just need a couple tools and a strong man (preferably covered in tattoos). This is the part where we discovered that THE FLOOR IS LAVA, aka covered in STICKERS. I didn't have to get in them, but it hurt when I tried to brush them of SBF's shirt. Anyhow, CWV's new number looks FABULOUS on her!!

The original bumper. 

The bumper we were snagging from Sister Van.

Rolling around in the stickers to remove the old bumper while the new bumper waited patiently nearby.

Putting the new bumper in place. (I helped with this part!!)

And ta-dah! CWV has a brand new-to-her shiny bumper that you can STEP ON so you can see the rusty roof better. It's pretty dang cool, actually. Thank you, Sister Van!  We didn't install the old bumper onto Sister Van. It's right next to her in the dirt if you want your own rusty old Club Wagon bumper.

sister vans

Meet the CWV's sister van. She lives in a salvage yard on the East Side of the ATX. Apparently a junk yard dog lives here too, but I bet he doesn't get far without a paw full of stickers.  We are taking all her good stuff and leaving behind a bunch of stuff we don't want. She was once a church van and one of the things left in her funky cup holder was a stick of Blistex. One of the random things in CWV's cupholder was a Hall's cough drop. We didn't use either.

lying down

Tonight after dinner I asked my SBF if he wanted to come over and hang out. He said he just felt like going home and lying down. I got it. We had an early morning and rode our bikes 30-something miles in rain and WIND and up lots of hills in the gorgeous Texas hill country. But I had no idea THIS is what he meant. (I'm not quite sure what's being investigated ... maybe a plug or something ... ?)

Gia on duty

Don't F with us. The creepy white van is now being guarded by the baddest villain in the land, Miss Gia. Also, SBF got a little excited and pulled out the first row of seats BECAUSE HE COULD. Kinda crazy how easy that was to do.

hubcap hate

I don't know exactly why, but SBF hates these hubcap covers. (I kind of like them, but what do I know.) He says they're gonna be painted black.

The initial check list

I offered to take The Van to the car repair shop while my SBF is out of town, and this is the list he sent me with. I don’t think the guy checking me in at the computer was expecting such a long list because he kept asking me to back up. And my list took up 4 little pink sticky notes on his desk. We forgot to mention that the A/C isn’t blowing in the back and needs to be checked, but otherwise I think all the important safety items are covered. This will cost $212 just to evaluate. That will be the first money he puts in, not counting the first 30 gallon fill up after we left the car lot because she was pretty much on E at purchase time.

Change:
-Engine oil and filter
-Transmission oil and filter (if applicable)
-Coolant
-Brake fluid
-Rear axle oil
-Drive belts (serpentine)
-Air filter
-Spark plugs, wires, cap and rotor (if applicable)
-Check brake pads and rotors
Rear axle drive shaft input seal may need to be replaced
-Eval front end bushings/pivots When braking the steering wheel has a slight shimmy as well as at about 50 mph (front end bushings?)
-Rear driver side door cable is detached somewhere. Replace fix as necessary
-Wind shield wipers

Free Candy!

My SBF tried to comment that his van is not creepy. It has too many windows. Too many big, beautiful, untinted windows. He’s right. It’s not that creepy. But what if we wrote “FREE CANDY!” down the side?! Then it’s a little creepy.